Jokes for Kids

  • What does the talking weighing machine tell to a fat woman when she steps on it?
  • One at a time ,please

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  • Mother:Lilly, how was your first day at school?
  • Lilly:Oh, it was fun, but there was some man called teacher, who kept shouting at us

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  • A small boy enters a mechanic shop and the mechanic whispers to one his customer: ‘He is the dumbest kid in the world. Have a look why I say so.’
  • He puts a $10 coin in one hand and two $1 coins (1+1=2) in the other one, he then calls the boy and asks, ‘Which do you want, son- one coin or two coins?’
  • The boy takes the two $1 coins and leaves. The mechanic said, ‘I told you so. Am doing it for past several days, but this kid never learns!’
  • Later, when the customer goes out, he finds the same boy coming out of an ice-cream store. ‘Hey, boy! can I ask you a something? ‘
  • ’Why you took two $1 coins instead of one $10 coin? Don’t you know one $10 coin is higher than two $1 coins’
  • The boy licked his ice-cream and said ‘Because the day I take the $10 coin,the game would be over.’

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  • Why was Mr. Maths really upset?
  • Because his son was a problem

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  • A moron (stupid) goes to a pizza-shop,orders a pizza & tells the pizza-boy:’ Make sure that you cut it in three pieces as I may not be able to eat more than three as I am not that much hungry’.

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  • Give an example of complete waste of time
  • Telling a hair-raising story to a bald man

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  • Teacher :Sara,if you have 15 chocolates, and Mac asks you for 10 out of them,how many would you have left?
  • Sara:Ma’am 15,I hate Mac

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  • Mother:So what did you learn today?
  • Son: How to write
  • Mother: Hmmm , what did you write?
  • Son: I wrote something but I don’t know as I don’t know reading!

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  • Mac took a donkey to the school, do you know why?
  • Because other day ,his teacher told few misbehaving students that it is very easy for her to make them well-behaved as she has made many men out of donkeys

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  • Question: How can you keep an idiot busy for days?
  • Answer: Very simple,give him a one piece of paper with ‘Please turn over’ written on both the sides.

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